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Q. How do men cope with the truth of their own death?

A. There are four main ways.

1. A man may deny death's reality. Many try to deny the aging process and find it difficult to accept the reality of their own death. Paul Tournier, the Swiss Christian psychiatrist says: "Acceptance of old age is the best preparation for death, but also … acceptance of death is the best preparation for old age."

2. A man may give up. Our culture treats death as abnormal. We rush people off to the hospital, sedate them heavily, and isolate them from everyone so no one will have to be exposed to death. A man may be so discouraged by the reality of his ultimate death that he may give up the desire to continue living.

3. A man may be overcome with a fear of death. This may come from a lack of information about what happens at death. "Does it hurt to die? Will I still want to live even when I'm dying? How can I be sure where I'm going after I die?" Don't wait. Get factual information and work through each of these anxieties.

Or fear may come because a man is unprepared to face life after death, or to have his life evaluated by a righteous God. As you settle your standing with God, then you'll have peace about meeting Him.

4. A man may accept death. Coming fully to accept one's ultimate death gives a serene stability to life and prepares a person to enjoy the current life more completely.

Jim Conway counsels adults and speaks at conferences and retreats.

Adapted from Men in Midlife Crisis (Victor, 1978, 1997).

NOTE: For your convenience, Men in Midlife Crisis is available in the ChristianityToday.com Shopping Channel.

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Prayer for the Week

Father, I praise you for your victory over death. Jesus, thank you for making life possible for me through your death.

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